With all that God has been doing in our life lately, it comes as no surprise that Satan has put his attacks in over-drive. It would be very easy for me to start doubting and wondering if this is really what God is calling us to do. But I know my Father's voice and I know that this is His doing. I will rest in that. God knows we are made from dust. In the midst of the enemy's fit throwing, He is so gracious to continuously give us encouragement through confirmation. It's like a huge storm of doubts and questions roll in and He parts the clouds for a moment to shine his radiant smile into my heart and in an instant I feel Him saying "press on my sweet child and believe".
These past few days have been so busy and I have failed to find my special time to sit with Jesus. I pray in the morning and throughout the day but I schedule out a specific time with just He and I. In this time my heart is laid open bare and He speaks. Without this time, no one on the planet would want to be around me (no, really). This is my time of peace and restoration. So after a couple of days of not having this time, I couldn't get there quick enough today! I fell to my face and just told Him my heart and asked Him to show me His. He is such a wonderful and gracious God. I know that the only reason I desire so much to know His heart is because He put that desire there.
I then opened His Word and began to read. I turned to John chapter 7 about Jesus going to the Feast of Tabernacles. Overall, what stood out to me was the judgements and reactions that Jesus faced. We who have grown up in church know the stories of how Jesus was persecuted. Some believed He was the Christ, some a prophet and some thought He was demon-possessed. Although I have known this, there was a freshness that God gave me today. Jesus first of all did ONLY what the Father told Him to do. He spoke on God's behalf and for the glory of God not for himself. When He did this there were so many mixed reactions. I have been so guilty in the past of letting the judgments of others effect my view of myself and my decisions. Thank you Jesus that I have become much stronger in that area.
Another thing that stood out is His response to their accusations. I am "blessed" to be often put in conversations that are extremely frustrating. Those that breed frustration by pride and arrogance. The inability to actually listen because they are too worried about being "right" and making sure they feel superior. I am not at all threatened by this because I know my position as a child of God. But boy do I ever hate to be misunderstood! I have an ever-present urgency to try to make everyone understand my heart instead of just resting in who I am in Christ and letting Him make His love visible. I have a tendency to get frustrated in the conversations and act on emotions. I desire so much to respond like Jesus. He knew who He was and He knew not everyone was going to believe, but He loved them anyways. He called some a brood of vipers (yikes). He spoke truth with no apologies but He loved. I so desire to achieve this balance.
The bottom line is He knew what He came for. He did the will of the Father and did it perfectly. He knows that it hurts me when people misunderstand me and insult me but He told me to rejoice! All I need to do is keep my eyes on Him and remain in the Spirit.
I started thinking about the time of Jesus on this earth. Some loved him, some hated him, some believed in him, some tried to kill him but through it all He did the will of the Father. In the "Bible-belt" we have the tendency to grow up thinking that we can be like Jesus and still have everyone speak highly of you and life will be just grand. The truth is His word says the opposite. Luke 6:26 says "Woe to you when all men speak well of you, for their fathers used to treat the false prophets in the same way.". Jesus was persecuted and you think you can live like Him and not endure that? If you believe that then you and I are not reading the same Bible. The truth is the gospel is offensive to the flesh. It is a light that exposes the darkness of this world. The more you look like Jesus the more this world is going to hate you. If you are living a comfortable little "Christian" life with no persecutions of any kind, I encourage you to evaluate your heart. Have you really given Him everything? Are you willing to go and do whatever the Father asks? What do you love more your comfort or Jesus? I say this not only to you but to me also!
His servant,
Melissa
